we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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