you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
