she looked like the bat from fern gully.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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