Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
