you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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