never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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