I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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