I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
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