is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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