If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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