how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
We need to get me chipped asap
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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