every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
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you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
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I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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