i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
