I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
