The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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