It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
