i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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