I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
