why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize