Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
