i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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