idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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