ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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