How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
