can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
