Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
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