haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
