I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
