I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
You've changed since you got that strap on
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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