in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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