dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
