Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
