On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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