I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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