Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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