This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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