12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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