I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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