then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize