Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Randomize
