I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize