He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Please don't give away my fajitas
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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