omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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