Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
