she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
