Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
