Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
