Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
