I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I have tasted many bathrooms
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
