plz talk dirty to me
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
