well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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